9 Ways to Assure Your Wedding will be a Complete Disaster!
Planning and executing a great wedding is so boring. Who needs 50 years’ worth of fond memories when you can always look back on the terror of a bride face-planting during her entrance or everyone howling at the maid of honor’s alcohol-fueled pole dance? If you want a truly memorable wedding, here are the top ways to assure your wedding is a complete and total disaster. The publishers of Buzzfeed, Ranker, and PinterestFail.com thank you in advance for your contributions to their “worst of” posts.
Failing to Plan for Those “Plus Ones”
Your guest list is overflowing with those “always a bridesmaid, never a bride” friends, so you go on planning your seating charts and reception dinner as if they are a 100% solo act. Obviously, no one likes going to a wedding alone, so even if they have to bribe their gay bartender with a week’s worth of tips in advance to tag along, they’re not coming by themselves. Now your seating and your dinner lack the capacity for half of your guests. Woops. Better make those invitations for all your Single Ladies and gents to allow for those “plus ones” and keep tabs on those RSVPs as they come in. You’re welcome.
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Depending on Wanna-Be Photographers to Capture Your Special Day
Professional wedding photographers’ rates start at about 2 grand and skyrocket from there. Those services come with a boatload of knowledge and experience, including how to stay out of the way while still managing to capture all of the most special events. But, hey, everyone has camera phones nowadays, so just let your guests stand in the aisles, climb on the seats, get in the bride’s way on her glorious waltz down the aisle, and forget to snap important moments like the couple’s first kiss or cutting the wedding cake. Laughing? All of these horrors (and more) have resulted from depending on or allowing guests to take the place of professional photographers. Our recommendation? Budget for a good photographer and consider a polite, but firm, sign stating, “Welcome to Our Unplugged Ceremony” or “Be Nice; Turn Off That Device.”
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Neglecting to Specify a Dress Code
Weddings today range anywhere from beach-casual to white-tie formal, and anything and everything in between. Make it interesting! Don’t specify your preferred dress code and watch as the guests arrive in attire ranging from cutoff jeans to tuxedos and formal dresses suitable for the Grammys. Imagine the photos — your cousin in the itty bitty outfit she wore to the Bruno Mars concert (we had no idea she had THAT tattoo THERE) right beside your aunt in her authentic Versace dress. Stunning.
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Roasting at the Toasting
We’ve no idea why, but a few “best” men (using the term as lightly as possible) and others invited to offer up a toast to the new couple, decide that it’s the perfect time to roast the bride and groom. Now, your parents, grandparents, boss, coworkers, and even that sweet old lady in the apartment next door know all about your most embarrassing moment from 6th grade, as well as what you did your freshman year with that guy from chemistry class … Bachelor and bachelorette parties are excellent times for some good-natured roasting among close friends, who already know all about your previous shenanigans. The reception — not so much.
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Being Overly Liberal with the Open Bar
Open bars are generous, though expensive. But if you have some friends or family members who tend to imbibe a bit rigorously (or, perhaps worse, those who never imbibe at all and have positively zero tolerance for the stuff), you might want to rethink this generosity. YouTube has no shortage of humiliating videos of wedding guests gone wild, at the expense of the couple and their dear, unsuspecting parents. Limiting access to alcohol limits the chances you’ll end up on some “worst wedding disasters” post by Reddit.
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Forgetting to Accommodate Those Younger Guests
Who needs play areas? The kids can just chase each other in the aisles, wield chairs like medieval weapons, and trash the buffet tables. Or, you could provide special play areas to entertain your younger guests. If you have multiple friends with little ones, you might also consider a NYC wedding venue that offers areas for changing babies, high chairs, and other kiddy accommodations. Usually you can arrange for someone to watch the kiddies so the parents can enjoy the ceremony and reception. Consider enlisting the help of someone not otherwise on the guest list. For example, hire your neighbor’s teenager or a coworker’s college kid. Many young people could use the extra money, and you won’t be denying any of your guests the opportunity to enjoy and participate in your wedding.
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DIY-ing What Should Never be Done Yourself
Like photographers, cake decorators and decorations are expensive. You can save hundreds or even thousands of dollars by DIY-ing from ideas you find on Pinterest! Or, maybe not. Homemade cakes and decorations, unless done by knowledgeable, experienced crafters, look just that — homemade. Your wedding is — hopefully — a once in a lifetime affair. Most NYC wedding venues work closely with other wedding vendors, including cake makers, florists, and entertainers, to provide great deals on these products and services. They also have arsenals of decorations available for your choosing, which are nominally priced considering the overall cost of a New York wedding. Some things are better left to the pros.
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Unnecessarily Complicating the Ceremony & Reception
It’s so tempting to want to stage a Hollywood-worthy entrance for the bride or to create some unusual variation on the traditional receiving line. The problem is, you create too much room for error. Even the most graceful, poised bride can trip on an ornate staircase, and even the savviest guests can get confused if you make the reception too complicated. Don’t make it easy for the wedding attendants or guests to get confused and embarrass themselves. As the saying goes, “Keep it simple … um … silly!”
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Typos in Your Invitations, Wedding Programs, or Wedding Signs
Using “or” instead of “our” or “their” instead of “they’re” can ruin an otherwise gorgeous invitation, wedding program, or sign. Get a Grammar Nazi friend or family member to double-check and triple-check anything you write or print for the wedding, ceremony, and reception. You want social media to buzz with fabulous pics of you guys saying your vows, enjoying your first dance, and cruising off into the sunset; you don’t want your Instagram feed filled with photos of your sign that reads, “Please Sine Our Guessbook.”
One way to sidestep disaster is to partner with the wedding pros at Yachts for All Seasons. All jokes aside, we take weddings seriously. From choosing the ultimate wedding charter yacht to selecting the perfect decorations, reception dinner menu, entertainment, flowers, and more — we’ve got you covered. No NYC wedding venue offers you more. Visit our website today to get started on your grand wedding un-disaster!
